Squirrels

 

         Today I love to watch both gray and fox squirrels from my porch, and there is one tree just a ways from my office where baby gray squirrels are born every year.  They emerge from the hole in the early spring and are so small they look a little like chipmunks.  They venture forth, and at the slightest movement of a bird or another squirrel nearby, they dash back into their nursery as fast as they can go scared to death of the big world they are just becoming aware of.  

         In late summer I often watch both species cut leaves and build sunning nests high in the forked limbs of oaks and hickories, where they may nap and rest in midday heat.  It takes me back to those days as a boy, hunting squirrels with a seriousness I just can’t muster now.  And squirrel hunting not only taught me so much about the outdoors, it provided memories in abundance, like the time I was walking slowly through the woods hunting and a fox squirrel fell out of a limb right above me, brushing my shoulder and hitting the ground with a thud.  

         He must have been watching me from a limb above and lost his balance.  No squirrel ever retreated any faster, but he was a goner if I had squeezed the trigger on my little single-shot 16-gauge Iver Johnson.  I didn’t, because Dad had told me that when you shoot a squirrel running away from you, you fill the back legs with shot and ruin the meat. Besides that, he was going to fast for my ability with a shotgun, and I didn’t want to waste an eight-cent shell.  I have seen many squirrels fall, from limbs or electric lines, but I never seen one killed by a fall.

         Of all the mammals I am aware of in the Ozarks, and birds too for that matter, the squirrel is the only one I know of that both hibernates and migrates.  Think about that!  In the fall, or even late summer or early winter, when food supplies dwindle as they do in years of poor mast (nuts and acorns) you can actually see a migration of squirrels for perhaps as much as twenty or thirty miles.  In the early 1980’s I saw thousands of squirrels swimming across Bull Shoals Lake over a period of two or three days, from the northern shores to the south, and from the western shores to the east.  Hundreds of them drowned.  

  
 

      Several rodent diseases affect them, but their biggest enemy is likely birds of prey.  Fox squirrels get into a den or nest fairly early in the evening but gray squirrels will be seen roaming around and active when it is getting so dark you can barely see the sights on your gun.  So grays are a favorite prey of great horned owls, maybe only second in an owl’s preference to skunks, which owls love to eat.   

         I will end with the story of a young girl who grew up in the city and married a young man who was so much a hillbilly that he ate squirrels like chickens eat June-Bugs… with enthusiasm.  They had only been married a couple of weeks when he presented her with two nice young fox squirrels, cleaned and ready to cook. He told her how much he’d like to have some squirrel and dumplin’s like his mother made.  Having a mother who had been a country girl herself, this new bride called home to find out what a dumplin’ was and how to make it.

         Her mother went through the whole rigamarole of how to mix the ingredients and make it into a big dough ball, but somehow the conversation got distracted and the young wife never got the idea that the big ball of dough was to have little hunks of dumplings pinched off and flattened the way that old time cooks did it.

         That night the young outdoorsman, who looked a lot like me, noticed that while the squirrels were delicious, there was just one dumpling, a little bigger than a softball.  The young girl, who really looked a lot like my wife Gloria Jean, got all upset and cried because she would never be a good cook.  And she was right; she never was a really good cook, like my mother and grandmother.  But then again, I never was the squirrel hunter my grandpa was.

 

More about squirrels in next week’s column…