and shooting snooker with Grandpa McNew
Vice
President Joe Biden wrote a letter to his 12-year old self and there were folks
so touched that it brought tears to their eyes. Get ready to cry again folks ‘cause here is my letter to
myself when I was 12.
Dear
Larry,
It
is hard to see a twelve year old boy so torn up about something so let me assure
you… you will indeed be able to shoot flying ducks in time! Some day you’ll never
again have to shoot the ones which are sitting on the water like… well… like
sitting ducks. And in time, those
backlashes in your fishing reel will be almost non-existent. I hope that is some comfort to you!
You
are really a lucky kid getting to work at your dad’s pool hall. Few twelve year olds have so many
friends, even if most of them are old codgers. And you should know, thinking as you do that your teachers
hate you, that some of them don’t.
Not many, but some! Mrs.
Smith, the one who dislikes you the most will brag on what a great influence she
had on you when you start selling articles to Outdoor Life and Field and Stream
and publish your first book or two.
Sure seems strange that a kid who avoids books like you do would some
day write one.
Oh
well Larry, I wanted to offer you some good advice in this letter so lets get
to it. First of all, stay away
from alcohol and drugs. In fact it
is far best to stay away from those kids who use alcohol and drugs as
well. A lot of them aren’t going
anywhere but to jail, and to an early death. It is good that you have been able to see, there in that
pool hall where you work after school, what tobacco does to men as well. If you choose to smoke or chew, you
will indeed reinforce what Mrs. Smith said about how you couldn’t get any
dumber!
I
know that right now, at your age, your biggest worry is the copperheads and the
cottonmouths on the ridges and the river.
You need to know that you should throw lawyers and politicians in with
them someday… and judges who once were lawyers. They are people who prey on the unfortunate, the little
people, the commoners. As someone
once said in the Bible… “the truth is not in them”. But one thing they are good at is making lots of money and
getting rich.
The
‘truth’ that seems so sought-after in your youth will be hard to come by as you
grow old. That television your grandparents
just bought is a wonderful thing.
I know how excited you and your cousins were when you watched Davy
Crockett and Gunsmoke for the first time.
I hate like heck to tell you this, but that old Devil the preacher talks
about so much at the Brown Hill Church will someday find his finest tool in
that new invention, which will warp and deceive lots of kids and adults way
down the road. But he has
lots of tools, like those huge nationally-owned newspapers and something called
the internet, which you don’t understand now, and won’t understand ever.
The
fifty cents an hour you are making now guiding city folks on fishing trips down
the Big Piney in your old wooden johnboat seems like a lot of money now, but as
hard as this is to believe you will be making 75 cents an hour as a guide by
the time you are fifteen. Reckon
that ought to make you as happy as sinking the eight ball in the corner pocket!
It
is a fact that there isn’t a 12-year-old in the whole country who can paddle a
johnboat better than you. And
shucks, I’ll bet that as far as 12-year-old snooker players go, you are in the
top ten percent.
I
know that isn’t much comfort for a kid who wishes he could play basketball and
football, but here’s some encouragement.
None of the kids you know playing those sports will ever make any money
at that after they graduate. Some day you’ll make quite a bit playing pool and
snooker. But, uh, like football,
playing nine-ball for money is a good way to get a concussion eventually so I
am awfully glad you will finally give that up. Gambling, too, destroys a lot of people. It is like donuts and pecan pie, it
gets aholt of a kid before he knows it.
I
am disappointed that you lack any social graces, because it probably would be a
good idea to go to the school prom someday. But then, you are a little on the homely side, and you can’t
dance, and you are terrible when it comes to talking to girls. It is likely a
good decision you will make about camping on some Big Piney gravel bar instead.
It
is good to avoid girls altogether when you aren’t any smarter than you are and
have no more money than you do. I know those cheer-leaders look good now but
boy you won’t believe how quick they get fat and homely! Statistics say that there are more
divorced cheerleaders in their thirties and forties than hornyhead chubs on a
Big Piney shoal in the middle of April.
Enjoy
life while you are a boy. Catch bullfrogs, hunt squirrels and set trotlines.
When you are grown, that creek you and your cousins swim in on Grandpa McNew’s
farm will be dried up and the Piney will be polluted. Many springs will be gone, the big trees in the woods you
hunt in will be cut down.
But
those old timers you sat and listened to; the good men in that little church, and
your dad and your grandfathers… their memories and teachings and the common
sense they taught you, will serve you well all your life. Seek out folks like them, stay away
from those places where men live like a great herd of cattle.
Find
a place where there remains the old-fashioned ideas and values that you learned
as a boy, and never ever make your decisions in life based only on money. You will find that some of the most
miserable people are those who have big bankrolls and some of the happiest folks
are those who just keep a few bucks in a can under the bed. Avoid like the
plague a man whose greatest goal in life, whose very happiness when he gets up
in the morning, is the gaining of one more dollar.
Listen
to God when you are deep in the woods, and go there often. Don’t get proud of yourself, and don’t
be ashamed of yourself, because the little talent and ability the creator gave
you is enough. Do what God put you
on earth to do.
Try
your best to be a gentleman, even if don’t ever own but one tie! Stand up for the weak, the oppressed
and the less fortunate; don’t ever watch women or children or animals be
treated cruelly without trying to do something about it. Be proud to let
everyone know that old-fashioned, masculine men can still be devoted to the words
and teachings of Jesus, and even if they fall down a lot and often make dumb
mistakes, they can still be constantly TRYING to follow Him, just as men did in
the old days.
Don’t
worry about counting the stars, or understanding the sun. Just put your trust in the One who made
them and your life will be blessed beyond comprehension. Thank Him often for that.
And
no matter how perverted and sick and evil this world becomes, get away from it
and retreat to the good earth and good people who are still there, off to the
side of the main stream, like the caves and sycamores still sitting silently
along the Piney. You are a little
like Peter, the fisherman who stumbled a lot and had to wait until he got old
to be worth anything. Someday he
might just tell you where the best fishing is in heaven… and where there might
be an old-time pool hall.
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